Proof Her? I Hardly Know Her

Following the events of the huge lightning strike at the morgue, Jazmine knew not what became of her kitchen. The proofer she loved to hide all the dough tunnels in, watching them rise like football newbies getting recognized for their invaliant efforts. The incinerator in which she deposited dead bodies but went in to withdraw nothing but ashes. Even the cold ovens that sometimes reeked of propane fumes because the tanks were nearly empty.

She stood in front of the empty proofer, aloof of all the buzzing ovens and drome fans surrounding her.

“Why me?” she asked aloud. “I’m the only one who ashifies everything, but I get punished. No proofer to stand at for hours on end and send selfies to my man friend and get paid for it.”

Her eyebrows lit up as she just hatched an idea. She plugged in the proofer after moving it over to an outlet and flipped its switch.

SPARK.

And a click.

Silence.

No whirring noises as would normally happen when the proofer came to life.

She tried it again but only to receive the same result.

“Karl, the proofer had an accident!”

He came out to witness the machine send sparks in every direction, jumping back with fright as if they were little fiery spiders leaping on him.

“Nuh uh. I’m not dealing with this thing. So you know what I’m going to do?”

Jazmine could only shrug because she knew not the implications the Karl had or the reasons for why he had them in the first place. One could have thought he would find a repairman to get the machine back up and running again. Another could have supposed he would have bought parts and have one of his own staff fix ‘er up. But to everyone’s dismay, especially Beverly’s…

“I’ve ordered a new proofer. Dutch doors. 120 volts on an alternative current. Better insulation, and best of all – it’s brand spankin’ new. And now it’s just the wait. So for now, just boil some water, throw the dough in, and call it a day.”

Beverly, several days later, came to Haslia and Arlo.

“Four thousand dollars for one of those beasts? Why?” She whimpered and held her head in her hands in disbelief, for she also knew there were better solutions. But with someone as simple-minded and naive as Karl, everything gets scrapped and replaced though maintenance very much is a wise thing if it can be done. Yet, he somehow got through school and mayorship without a working brain…